From the looks of the footage, Hakan appears to be a grappler along the lines of Zangief or Abel. Don't let that mislead you into believing he's just another musclebound clod in impossibly tight shorts, however. What separates this new guy from the rest of the pack are his bright orange, Jersey Shore-esque tan and the almost supernatural amount of... uh... lubrication dripping from his chiseled body.

Yeah, Hakan is one slippery fella. And he takes advantage of his trademark greasiness by sliding all over the ring at lightning speeds. The end result looks to be a fighting style that's just as unique as it is vaguely unsettling.

San Francisco had gone from a sunny weekend to a sudden downpour on Monday night. But not even the chilly bayside winds, drizzle, and bouts of hail could deter those waiting to attend the Final Fantasy XIII launch party at the Regency Center that night, one of the first in a no doubt week long string of events with the annual Game Developers Conference in town. Square Enix employees were of course out in full force with Yoichi Wada, and Motomu Toriyama leading the charge. Others to grace the red carpet that night included Microsoft group director Albert Panello, ESA president Mike Gallagher, SCEA SVP Rob Dwyer, Mark Cerny, Graeme Devine, Corrinne Yu, Chris Taylor, Feargus Urquhart, Playboy's Jo Garcia, Final Fantasy XIII voice actor's Ali Hillis and Troy Baker, and many more.

The night started off with the red carpet, but the crowd quickly moved into the event's main hall, which had game kiosks lined up, display cases full of FF13 collectibles and figurines, and character art adorning the walls. Even the tables were branded with "XIII" on the tops. After making sure to pass out possibly the sturdiest and most comfortable pair of 3D glasses I've ever worn, Square Enix also debuted a spectacular FF13 trailer in 3D. The baby chocobo that seemingly flew out into the crowd at the end was icing on the cake. The rest of the evening consisted of a lot of chatter amongst the guests, after an on-stage panel consisting of some of the launch party's VIP guests, with DJ Danny Masterson providing music alongside dancing event babes.

According to the site, a person suffering from Mapathy "no longer derives pleasure from blowing up people hiding in the cockpit or on top of the crane," and it continues, "More than 20 million people may be at risk for Mapathy." Assuming you haven't already jumped ship to Bad Company 2, those symptoms probably sound all too familiar.

Like pretty much every other imaginary ailment with a marketing budget, however, there is a cure for Mapathy: new maps. And according to the teaser site, that cure is headed for Xbox Live on March 30. Infinity Ward's Robert Bowling assures us that PlayStation 3 and PC users will eventually get their hands on the DLC as well, but that announcement is coming at a later date.

"Although Jagged Alliance 2 was published over ten years ago now, the game still represents a milestone in the genre and boasts a huge following of loyal fans," said bitComposer Games CEO Wolfgang Duhr.

"We are delighted to acquire this classic game for bitComposer, and want to continue the success of the previous titles in the series, while giving the new version a contemporary look, bearing in mind the strong features of its predecessors."

This new heavy weapon apparently "ionizes targets with a non-visible laser to ready them for a high-voltage electrical attack."

The description continues, "As the lightning-like bolt hits its first target, a sophisticated auto-targeting system paints succeeding targets with the ionization laser, allowing the electricity to take the path of least resistance and arc between them.

The studio wrote, "Harmonix is developing Rock Band 3 for worldwide release this holiday season! The game, which will be published by MTV Games and distributed by Electronic Arts, will innovate and revolutionize the music genre once again, just as Harmonix did with the original Rock Band, Rock Band 2 and The Beatles: Rock Band. Stay tuned for more details!"

We've heard hints that Rock Band 3 is under development since last year, when consultant Dhani Harrison suggested that he wanted the title to teach people how to play music. Rock Band 3 will be the second title in the franchise this year, the other being Green Day Rock Band.

If the rumor does pan out, it makes one wonder which Robin he would be playing. Dick Grayson has long since become Nightwing, so Arkham Asylum 2 would have to take place in the past for it to be the first Robin. Martella could be playing Jason Todd, as he is in the movie, but Todd was killed by the Joker. That could lend itself to flashbacks or Scarecrow sequences, but likely not an active role. If Martella is a playable Robin, the smart money is on Tim Drake, who is both age-appropriate and alive.

In other casting news, many of the familiar voices from Arkham Asylum are said to return on the IMDb page, along with the inclusion of Bruce Greenwood as Two-Face. You may recall Greenwood as Christopher Pike from J.J. Abram's Star Trek. He is also credited for a role in the upcoming Batman cartoon, as the Bat himself.

U.K. gaming site MCV first reported on the cards, which feature unique codes for entry on the Square Enix Members website. From there you'll earn access to an unspecified in-game item for Square's upcoming MMO, as well as a shot at getting into the beta.

Which console did you go with for Final Fantasy XIII? Or are you skipping out on this one entirely?